Wednesday, November 22, 2017

"On Fire": If You're Afraid of Being Single, You're Not Ready for Marriage

 

"There is no fear in love [dread does not exist], but full-grown (complete, perfect) love turns fear out of doors and expels every trace of terror! For fear brings with it the thought of punishment, and [so] he who is afraid has not reached the full maturity of love [is not yet grown into love’s complete perfection]."---I John 4:18(AMPC)


Honestly?

I've been meaning to sit down and pen this for a while. The title has been sitting in the drafts section of this blog for a hot minute. But as I continue to get so many emails from the "Will God Flat-out Tell You Who Your Husband Is?", I honestly wanted to make sure that it was the right time. I wanted to see how many women were simply looking for insights on their journey vs. the ones who were flat-out anxious...maybe even desperate. The anxiety wins out. By a long shot.

It really is a trip that I am 43, never-been-married and at least 30-40 percent of how my time is spent is dealing with people who A) want to get married; B) are married or C) reconciling folks who are on the verge of divorce or are in a broken covenant (which is really all divorce is; not "single again"...in a broken covenant).

What some of you may not know is that I also pay out of pocket to send married couples to hotel rooms and bed and breakfasts in order to reignite the passion in their relationship. I do it because just as much as sex IS NOT for us singles, it is TOTALLY FOR married folks (I Corinthians 7:1-5)! I'm all about supporting them in "gettin' theirs" in any way that I can (LOL)!

And yet, it's something. The more that I serve married people, the more that I seek (Matthew 7:7-8) and study (2 Timothy 2:15--AMPC) about marital covenant and what YHVH, the God of Covenant, requires in order for a marriage to work and last, the *less anxious* I am about getting married. 

Partly due to this:

"He who has knowledge spares his words, and a man of understanding has a cool spirit."---Proverbs 17:27(AMPC)

The more I come to understand about the point, purpose and responsibility that comes with marriage, the calmer/cooler I am concerning it.

Partly due to this:

"Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God. And God’s peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."---Philippians 4:6-7(AMPC)

This Scripture is not a mere request. What I have learned in my own faith walk (2 Corinthians 5:7, Hebrews 11, Mark 11:22) is that it's a command; that we are being *disobedient* when we're anxious about ANYTHING---including the desire to be married or...even have it confirmed who our "the one" even is.

For one thing---and I know this is hard for a lot of people to hear---God does not *owe* us a husband. In fact, I venture to say half of the anxiety a lot of women feel could be settled, just with this revelation alone! Marriage, like anything else from the Lord, is a gift for the sake of his purposes most of all. In other words, marriage is FAR MORE about him and his plan than our personal wants and agendas. Once you accept this reality (Ecclesiastes 7:18--Message), there's calm.

Also, what I have learned is that in the moments when I am anxious, I need to double-check my prayer life. Titus 1:2 tells us that God cannot lie and Philippians 4 tells us that prayer results in peace---of, as the Classic Amplified Version puts it "of being content" (Hebrews 13:5--AMPC). If you're not feeling anywhere close to this...it's time to focus more on praying than worrying (another thing we're not supposed to do--Matthew 6:25-34) about when you're gonna get married.

Related image 

There's more though...

Since I am a marriage life coach, I deal with all sorts of issues that married couples have. And let me tell you, Proverbs 21:9(AMPC) is alive and not-so-well in *many* homes: "It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop [on the flat oriental roof, exposed to all kinds of weather] than in a house shared with a nagging, quarrelsome, and faultfinding woman.

What kind of woman tends to be like this? Frankly, one with a Jezebel spirit is what first comes to mind. The second is a woman with all sorts of anxiety---a woman who expects her *husband* to do more for her than *God* should (which is a slick form of idolatry---Exodus 20:3) OR a woman who is more caught up in *her* timing than the Father's (Acts 1:7--Message, Ecclesiastes 3:11).

And so, if you're not someone who hasn't gotten a hold of how to handle anxiety while you're single, I don't know how in the world you're going to be able to pull off dealing with the ups and downs (and there are PLENTY of 'em!) of marriage after saying "I do". 

Psalm 7:9 tells us that God tests our hearts. 
Could the season you're in right now be a test?
Are you passing?

And then, there's fear...

Fear: a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid; concern or anxiety; solicitude

That word in the picture quote? 
It speaks of people who have a phobia about remaining single

Phobia: a persistent, irrational fear of a specific object, activity, or situation that leads to a compelling desire to avoid it

While I don't suffer from anuptaphobia, I do struggle with acrophobia---the fear of heights (I even joined the "acros" team in high school so that I could work on overcoming it!). And did you peep how a phobia is defined? It's a persistent fear; not only that, it's an IRRATIONAL FEAR.

And here's the thing about fear...

2 Timothy 1:7(AMPC) tells us "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control." Since God didn't give fear to us, that basically leaves us with one other source: SATAN. Why do you want to hold on to ANYTHING that comes from *that* dude?! And here's the thing. He's usually only planting a *seed* of fear; one that we can refuse if we only choose to (I Corinthians 10:13). We're the ones who feed into fear by obsessing over *irrational thoughts*.

Because unless God said, flat-out, that you're *not* getting married, why trip?
And if that *is* what he said, trust that he has a better plan.
(Ephesians 3:20-21, I Corinthians 2:9-10)

Either way, you're gonna be fine...
No fear need---if you REALLY trust the Maker of you *and* of marriage.

And still there's more...

Image result for quotes on god meeting our needs 

The lead Scripture for this tells us that THERE IS NO FEAR IN LOVE. So, if you have a fear of being single, there is some love lacking somewhere. Love for God, love for self or love for trusting that God's will is best (which is basically a "hybrid" of the other two). Besides, if fear is what motivates you now, you'll be unable to get to the point and place of *spiritually maturing* (Hebrews 5:12-14) to where you can love someone else. 

Real talk? That might be why a lot of single women are not married (yet). If they can't get a handle on how to be perfected in self-love and loving God with their all (reverse the order, actually---Mark 12:30-31), how can they *possibly* handle the kind of love and responsibility that marital covenant requires?! Because a fearful woman? She's not the kind of lady who fits this bill:

"A capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman—who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls. The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of [honest] gain or need of [dishonest] spoil. She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her."---Proverbs 31:10-12(AMPC)

Do YOU trust anxious and fear-filled folks?
I know I don't.
So, why should we expect GOD to give a man a woman who lives that way?

It might be a hard thing to hear yet the truth sets us free (John 8:31-32) and the free-setting truth is that if you're afraid of being single, thank the Lord for his wisdom of knowing that you're not yet ready for marriage. Wives are to be helpers (Genesis 2:18) to their husbands. If single women can't settle into trusting the Perfect One (Deuteronomy 32:4) while in their single state, there is no way they can be trusted to be of *good help* to their man---a flawed being.

James 5:16 instructs us to "confess and be healed"...
If you know you have a bout of anuptaphobia, the remedy isn't marriage...
The cure is going to the Father about howto get that phobia handled.

If a husband is what God indeed has for you...
You need to learn how to become FEARLESS *before* he arrives.
(Proverbs 18:21)

No time like the present...right?
Selah. And amen. 


His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...

SRW


Thursday, November 9, 2017

"On Fire": (VIDEO) A Faith-Based Union Needs a Faith-Walking Woman (even While She's Single)

I wrote this in my journal before I met my husband and prayed that he would be this type of man... now praying the same for my girls!

"To the faithful you show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity."---Psalm 18:25(NLT)


First of all...

I really dig that picture quote because it's what Billy Graham's wife, Ruth Bell, said she wanted in a husband. Death and life really are in the power of the tongue (Proverbs 18:21). SPEAK. LIFE!

Anyway, as I continue to get emails from women who believe that God has told them who their husband is, I "happened upon" (Proverbs 16:33--AMPC) a video today that captured my attention. One reason was because I dig the name of the series: FAITHSTRUT (2 Corinthians 5:7). Another reason is because of the topic. It's about a single woman who believes with everything in her that God has shown her who her husband is...even though she has not met him yet.

There are two cool things that are standouts to me about her story. Actually, three.

1) She shares a lot of other faith twists-and-turns; she's a woman of faith, period. (Psalm 7:9)

2) She is PREACHING when she talks about the power of prayer, the importance of interceding for your husband before ever knowing him and how there is a spiritual connection that happens well before a physical one. How *intimate* praying for another person---especially the one the Lord has for you---is.

3) She hasn't met him yet. She's currently *still* on her faith journey just as much as some of you are.

It all makes me think of something that I discovered about faith a few years ago...

The Hebrew word for love is "ahavah" which basically breaks down into "I give".

The Hebrew word for faith is very similar. It's "amanah". It means "support" and "agreement".

Faith walks are not easy. Just ask all of the people in the "Faith Hall of Fame" in the Bible (Hebrews 11). But if you don't allow this time of singleness to be when you learn how to hear from God and trust him completely (Proverbs 3:5-6), how will you get into position for helping (Genesis 2:18) and submitting (Colossians 3:18) to the man that he brings you to (Genesis 2:22)? 

A good man's---and woman's---steps are ordered (Psalm 37:23). We have to be ready and willing to take things one step at a time. We have to "walk in AGREEMENT" (Amos 3:3) with God before *ever* attempting to do it with our spouse. We need *trust him* as he *supports us*.

Just a reminder for anyone who may be hanging on by a thread today...



I'm rooting for this woman, I really am!

STAY. FAITHFUL. AND. FAITH-FILLED.

It ALWAYS pleases God (Mark 11:22, Hebrews 11:6)


His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...

SRW

Sunday, November 5, 2017

"On Fire": God Wants to CUSTOMIZE You for Your Future Husband

Image result for song of solomon 4:7


Hey Ladies...

This isn't going to be as long as usual because I'm going to provide the link to the devotional that I penned on the topic yesterday. For those who desire the cliff notes, the bottom lines are these.

1) Something that's been coming up a lot lately are women and self-image. Women wanting to know why they don't attract men. Not *their man*. Men, in general. Something that I said in the devotional yesterday is *prostitutes* attract lots of men; it's how they make their money. A godly wife really shouldn't care what multiple men think. JUST. THEIR. HUSBAND.

2) I believe I've shared some form of this video before, but it's relevant to the point. Pastor John Gray confirms where I'm coming from here:



3) BEFORE SIN, Adam gave Eve (Genesis 3:20) a different name. It was "Woman": "And Adam said: 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.'" (Genesis 2:23--NKJV) Ah! Something that I'm just now getting is because Adam saw Woman, his wife, as a part of him, that's why the Word says this: "So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.  For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church."(Ephesians 4:28-29--NKJV) Anyway, that's why I find it endearing when a husband refers to his wife as "my woman". It's *just* what Adam said and a part of the reason why he said it was because he discerned (Proverbs 2) that God made someone who was *just* for him.

4) God is the Ultimate Matchmaker---at least, we should allow him to be (Proverbs 3:5-6 & 16:3). This means that since he is Spirit (John 4:24), he is FAR MORE CONCERNED with *the spiritual connection* of two people than how they look. It doesn't stop there, though. Since God formed all of us in the womb (Psalm 139:13) and satisfies the hand of *every* living thing (Psalm 145:16), he also knows what will attract/please each of us---*far more than we do*. And, since he dwells in the spirit realm, he can provide each and every one of us with wisdom on what the spouse *he* has in mind for us desires in a mate---physically, emotionally, mentally and everything in between. In other words, our Creator can *customize* (to modify or build according to individual or personal specifications or preference) us to their liking. That way, rather than being out here falling for the okie doke of what society says is beautiful (I Peter 3:1-6) or coveting other women's looks/body types, etc. (Proverbs 20:17), we can simply ask God (James 1:5) "Will you reveal to me what *my future husband* desires in a wife and customize me to become that?" I've been doing it for a while now. Trust me, it works!

5) Here's the link: "Allow God to Do the 'CUSTOMIZING'". As always, if you have any questions, comments or prayer requests, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com.

In the meantime...

Rather than wanting to be the "quintessential beauty"...
Ask God how to *customize you for one man*...
YOUR. HUSBAND.


His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...

SRW

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

"On Fire": (VIDEO) Don't Rely on 'Signs' so Much as God's DIRECTIVES

Image result for the man god has for you quotes

"My child, never forget the things I have taught you. Store my commands in your heart. If you do this, you will live many years, and your life will be satisfying. Never let loyalty and kindness leave you! Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart. Then you will find favor with both God and people, and you will earn a good reputation. Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. Don’t be impressed with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from evil. Then you will have healing for your body and strength for your bones."---Proverbs 3:1-8(NLT)


Yeah...

I don't think I *ever* anticipated that my post "Will God Flat-out Tell You Who Your Husband Is?" would get so much traction. But almost two years later, the emails keep rolling in!

As I've been praying for the women who've been writing me, there are two things that I feel led (Luke 12:12) to share on a corporate level; especially after watching a video on signs that a married couple received about them knowing they were "the one" for each other:





I always adore when two virgins are joined! I also really like that the husband said his wife was his first kiss too. Beautiful.

And listen, as far as the wife sharing signs that her husband was the one? First, *every love story is unique* because, as Psalm 33:15 tells us, "He fashions their hearts individually; He considers all their works." Personally, my mother calls me her "signs and wonders child" because I know *for a fact* that God speaks in signs (Daniel 4:2-3)!

Yet there are two things I want to say as it relates to looking for signs and being...overly-dependent on them.

I remember once reading a very interesting piece that Andrew Wommack wrote on miracles. I know a lot of people who pray for those and something he said in particular about them had me be like "Whoa":

There are three important reasons for receiving from God through blessings rather than miracles. First, blessings prevent crises, while miracles deliver from crises. Second, a blessing is always a more abundant supply than a miracle. And third, miracles are a temporary fix, while blessings are permanent solutions. Therefore, if you’re living from miracle to miracle, it probably means you’re living from crisis to crisis.

Hmm...definitely something to consider next time you ask God to perform a miracle in your life!

Along these same lines, think about why we look for signs from God. It's usually to confirm something, right? Here's the thing, though. If we trusted God as much as we should, would we rely on signs so much?

I remember one of the last times I asked God for a sign concerning something that he had honestly already provided me *years worth* of signs about. He clearly said to me "Shellie, this is it" meaning, "We're basically done with the signs portion of the program. Walk by faith not by sight." "Sight" in the form of always looking for signs on this particular topic (2 Corinthians 5:7). I'll keep what went down to myself (it's OK to have some secrets between you and the Lord; that's how intimacy is cultivated--Psalm 139); however, I will say that the sign was pretty...indisputable.

Nothing earth-shattering has happened since, yet that's kind of the point. It's important to get to a place where taking God at his Word/word is enough. The Classic Amplified Version of Proverbs 3 tells us to seek God's will in all that we do. The New King James Version tells us to trust him with all of our heart.

When we do both of these things, he is able to *direct* us.

Direct: to manage or guide by advice, helpful information, instruction, etc.; to regulate the course of; control; to administer; manage; supervise; to give authoritative instructions to; command; order or ordain; to guide, tell, or show (a person) the way to a place; to point, aim, or send toward a place or object

Walking by faith isn't about moving if you get a sign...
Walking by faith is trusting in the One who provides signs---even if you *don't* get one.

Because signs or not? Here's what you can be certain about with the Lord:

"As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the Lord is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him. For who is God, except the Lord? And who is a rock, except our God? It is God who arms me with strength, and makes my way perfect."---Psalm 18:30-32(NKJV)

If you know that God will make your way perfect...
If you really and truly believe that (do you?)...
Why do you need a *sign*?

Just trust his *Word*.
AND FOLLOW HIS DIRECTIVES; HIS COMMANDS (Psalm 37:23).

Because here's the thing...

Whether we realize it---or want to admit it---when we become too reliant on signs, we're basically asking God to *prove himself* to us. That's...a bit much. God doesn't *owe* us anything; *especially* a mate! If he has one for us, it is a gift (James 1:17) and gift givers can bless others...whenever they want to.

Again, there's nothing wrong with signs...
God used/uses them often...
Just focus on doing what he says, as he says it, more than anything else.

Obedience requires faith more than signs (Mark 11:22)...
And it's placing faith in God that pleases him (Hebrews 11:6, Luke 11:11-13)!

The Bible calls it help mate • NOT sex mate. Room -mate, play -mate.

One more thing about signs...

It's important to ALWAYS keep this Scripture close and in its proper perspective:

"But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death."---James 1:14-15(NKJV)

This one too:

"But the natural, nonspiritual man does not accept or welcome or admit into his heart the gifts and teachings and revelations of the Spirit of God, for they are folly (meaningless nonsense) to him; and he is incapable of knowing them [of progressively recognizing, understanding, and becoming better acquainted with them] because they are spiritually discerned and estimated and appreciated."---I Corinthians 2:14(AMPC)

Another thing to keep in mind about signs is not to *lust* them...

What I mean by that is there are signs from God and then there are things that cause us to create "phantom pregnancy signs" because our desires have turned into idols. We want something *so badly* that we *make* things seem real when they...aren't.

That's basically what a phantom (false) pregnancy is:

False pregnancy, clinically termed pseudocyesis, is the belief that you are expecting a baby when you are not really carrying a child. People with pseudocyesis have many, if not all, symptoms of pregnancy -- with the exception of an actual fetus. Some men experience a related phenomenon known as couvade, or sympathetic pregnancy. They will develop many of the same symptoms as their pregnant partners, including weight gain, nausea, and backache.

Only recently have doctors begun to understand the psychological and physical issues that are at the root of pseudocyesis. Although the exact causes still aren't known, doctors suspect that psychological factors may trick the body into "thinking" that it's pregnant.

When a woman feels an intense desire to get pregnant, which may be because of infertility, repeat miscarriages, impending menopause, or a desire to get married, her body may produce some pregnancy signs (such as a swollen belly, enlarged breasts, and even the sensation of fetal movement). The woman's brain then misinterprets those signals as pregnancy, and triggers the release of hormones (such as estrogen and prolactin) that lead to actual pregnancy symptoms.

You think this only happens with pregnancies? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Yes, we serve a God who can do the impossible...*as it relates to things that are in accordance with his will* (I John 5:14-15). Yet when all we care about is what *we* want, that can cause us to throw common sense (something that God is a wealth of---Proverbs 2---Message) and reality (something that God deals in---Ecclesiastes 7:18--Message) totally out of the window! We'll want something to happen *so badly* that we will conjure up signs in our minds that aren't God; they're *all* us  and remember, Jeremiah 17:9-10 tells us that our hearts---the center of our emotions---tend to be deceptive (maybe a little Satan too; he does like to lie and deceive, after all!---John 8:44, 2 Corinthians 11:14).

How can you know the difference?

That's a blog-that's-more-like-a-book all on its own! I will say this for starters, though. Romans 14:17(AMPC) tells us that the kingdom of God is "...righteousness (that state which makes a person acceptable to God) and [heart] peace and joy in the Holy Spirit." This means that *when something is of the Lord, it will not compromise moral living, it will bring you peace and yes, even some joy*! 

When it's you? Usually there is anxiety that sets in; that's not good:

"Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God. And God’s peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."---Philippians 4:6-7(AMPC)

If you've been asking for signs concerning your future husband, I pray this gives you some clarity. I also hope that the focus will start to shift a bit from "Lord, show me a sign" to "Lord, help me to do just what you say. Sign or no sign."

Psalm 84:11 tells us that God withholds *no* good thing...


If something or one is in line with God's will for our lives...
Look to God for instructions/commands/orders---*then obey them*.

If you do that, there'll be less of a need for...signs.
I promise you that.


His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...

SRW


Sunday, October 15, 2017

"On Fire": Hop on the 'Marital Covenant Thursdays' Mailing List

35 Marriage Quotes #marriage #quotes

"Each young woman’s turn came to go in to King Ahasuerus after she had completed twelve months’ preparation, according to the regulations for the women, for thus were the days of their preparation apportioned: six months with oil of myrrh, and six months with perfumes and preparations for beautifying women. Thus prepared, each young woman went to the king, and she was given whatever she desired to take with her from the women’s quarters to the king’s palace. In the evening she went, and in the morning she returned to the second house of the women, to the custody of Shaashgaz, the king’s eunuch who kept the concubines. She would not go in to the king again unless the king delighted in her and called for her by name."---Esther 2:12-14(NKJV)



Yeah...

I've always adored these verses in Scripture. So much in fact that the first (adult) poem that I wrote ("I'm Single and That's Alright with Me") has a line in it that says "Esther 2:14 states that I am to wait on my king and when he's delighted in me, he will call me by my name. My Mama didn't name me Needy or Desperate."

There are layers of takeaways from Esther's journey---one that is faaaaaaaar more about making extreme sacrifices for her people than a love story of an orphan who married to king. As it relates to this blog and today's post:

1) Preparing for God's man for you requires preparation *on your part*. Proverbs 22:4(NKJV) says "By humility and the fear of the Lord are riches and honor and life." Trust me, I learned the *humilty's way* that it's *very arrogant* to think you are so ready for marriage that you're waiting on some man to get his stuff together. If God thought we were ready for marriage---especially the kind of marriage that hopefully this blog inspires you to desire---*we'd be married*. In other words, use this time to seek out what you need to be doing to become a good wife *as* you pray for your future husband to recognize and then receive you when you arrive. As they say, Proverbs 18:22(NKJV) reminds us that we must be wives *before* our husband comes: "He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord."

2) Esther prepared. Esther was ready. She wasn't chasing up under the king, though. She wasn't finding ways to emotionally manipulate him or monopolize his time either. When "he called her by name", she went to him. Kind of like how, yes, the Lord *brought* the Woman to Adam (Genesis 2:22); however, God nor the Woman told Adam who she was. ADAM DID: "Then Adam said, 'This [creature] is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of a man.'" (Genesis 2:23--AMPC)

With all of that said...

Prepare for Marriage, Not Just Your Wedding

I know posting on here is...erratic these days. Something that is constant, though, is the devotionals that I pen every Thursday though Mail Chimp.

Long story short, a friend of mine who is divorced inspired them...

A few months from remarrying, he accepted what the Word says about those (which is NOT to do it so long as your original spouse is alive *whether they are remarried or not*; I Corinthians 7:10-11 says so. Read more here and here) and broke the engagement off. He's currently praying for reconciliation with his wife (AMEN!). For a while, we fasted together on Thursdays about the restoration of their marriage.

He still does fast. Meanwhile, I've used that day to devote the devotionals that I pen (three times a week) to write solely about all things marriage. It's called "Marital Covenant Thursdays".

This past week, I penned one on monogamy that I *almost* posted here but...these devos aren't your five-minute reads (NOT. AT. ALL). Yeah, it's too long to post on here, so I had an idea.

If you want to read some consistent content that you know will (basically) come every Thursday, shoot me an email (missnosipho@gmail.com). I'll create a mailing list just for y'all so that the Thursday emails will automatically come to your inbox.

I get quite a few emails with questions about marriage, relationships, standards, etc. and those devos may bring some clarity---or inspire you to seek (Matthew 7:7-8) and study (2 Timothy 2:15--AMPC).

So...

If you want to get last week's (along with one that I penned on single men needing to see the value in having a wife) and the Thursday content that's to follow, hit me up.

In the meantime, as always, if there are prayer requests, shoot 'em my way.
YHVH, the God of Covenant, *loves* it when his daughters take marital covenant seriously.
And literally.


His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...

SRW


Wednesday, October 11, 2017

An Ounce of Prevention: (VIDEO) If You're Tired of Waiting...Watch This. (Married at 43)

Image result for wait for god's best quotes

"And now, Lord, what do I wait for? My hope is in You."---Psalm 39:7(NKJV)


So...

This interview is with a woman by the name of Lori Flowers who shares being in a 10-year relationship in her 20s, breaking up and not wondering if/when she would get married. She did at 43.

Depending on how old you are, this may fill you with hope or frustration (LOL).
Personally, I find it to be a great testimony either way.

It also reminds me of why I can't stand the whole boyfriend/girlfriend dynamic because you devote your life to one person *like you are married when you're not* which yes, can take up A LOT of your time and emotional investing (guard your heart, y'all--Proverbs 4:23). Plus, you may need to take *even more time* to heal from something that's like a divorce *but isn't* because the guy isn't your husband (although you treated him like he basically was).

Take me, for instance. I stopped having sex at 32. I am now 43. I needed ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL of this time to heal from 14 guys, four abortions and all of the processing in between. My future husband doesn't deserve the pressure of having to fix what *I* did. God knows what he's doing. Always (James 1:4, Ecclesiastes 3:11, Acts 1:7--Message).

Anyway, I get enough emails from women who wonder when/if their time will *ever* come to find this video...fitting. Hope it provides some hope (Romans 5:5) and clarity (Proverbs 17:27) to at least a few:




His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...

SRW

Monday, October 9, 2017

An Ounce of Prevention: A Series of GREAT #redefined Videos

Image result for your future spouse quotes

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths."---Proverbs 3:5-6(NKJV)


So...

I watched a few more videos from the couple below---and the one-liners are stellar.

Enjoy!


"What if your type is not God's will?"




"I don't have time to recover again."




"Just because something sounds good, doesn't mean it's sound or good."




"God is never gonna send you anybody who takes you away from him."



And the last one is on "the one"...



His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...

SRW